Gambling Puns

  1. Gambling Pins
  2. Sports Betting Puns
  3. Gambling Lapel Pins
  4. Casino Gambling Puns

Puns are loved by everyone, read our collection of the best puns. Our website has over 300 funny, stupid, clever and interesting puns organised into categories. Select a category below or if you are feeling lucky generate a random pun! A collection of short, funny jokes related to Gambling and Casinos!” Quick, Funny Jokes! Gambling, Casino Jokes Jokes on our Main.

Casino & gambling riddles

Solving riddles can be as rewarding as a winning hand of blackjack with the basic strategy. We’ve decided to take a look at some of the most common riddles about gambling and casinos and detail the answers below. See if you can figure them out before reading the answers – then you can take them to the tables yourself and distract your fellow players as they try to crack them. Or check out the best online casinos for Australians.

The casino players

Riddle: There are four men who sit at a casino all night long and play until the crack of dawn. They are there for money instead of fun with a separate score for every one.

When it is time to square the accounts, they each make fair amounts. No one lost, and all gain – can you you explain?

Answer: Each man is a musician for the casino’s entertainment.

A mysterious gambling association

Riddle: A large group, each with a different face – regularly in smaller groups of four with identity as your case.

The first group will bring a desire of wealth – to steal though is tough and requires stealth.

The second group distract you and lead your mind astray, but don’t let this happen or your life will pay.

The third group can be utilised to take a life, without even using a gun or a knife.

The final group can be used to hide a man who just happened to have died.

Now if you were paying attention, what is this mysterious association we mentioned?

Answer: A pack of cards – each clue describes the four suits of a deck.

  • First group – Diamonds, as they make you wealthy but are very hard to steal
  • Second group – Hearts, as they can lead you astray
  • Third group – Clubs, these are weapons which can be used to kill people
  • Fourth group – Spades, which can be used to cover up a murder by burying a body

Heads or tails

Riddle: A gambler has three coins in his hand – the first is a regular coin, the second has two heads, and the third has two tails. The gambler picks a coin at random, flips it, and the result is heads.

What is the likelihood the other side is tails?

Answer: Since there are three heads and only one has a tails on the other side the likelihood is one in three – more of a mathematical problem than a riddle but fun to crack nevertheless.

First to gamble with dice

Riddle: Who were the first people to play with a pair or dice?

Solution: Adam and Eve in Pairadice.

A BlackJack

Riddle: A man visited a local land-based casino and on his first hand he managed to get a blackjack, while the next hand he lost. He then got another hand with a blackjack and the next hand he lost again. He ended up leaving the casino having lost every single hand and with no winnings at all – how is this possible?

Answer: The first hand featured a Jack of Spades and his third hand featured a Jack of Spades, both of which are black Jacks.

A classic riddle for a classic casino game

Riddle:

The game is nice if you see pictures thrice. It bears fruit of trees, sometimes in threes. It is just an arms length in front of you, what is the game?

Answer: A pokies machine.

A simple riddle but a risky wager

Riddle: What does this say? Or nothing. Or nothing Poker planetwin365 download games.

Answer: Double or nothing.

Poker face

Riddle: What is the weakest hand in a game of Texas Hold’em, which you can have but still end on the river with a guarantee of victory?

Answer: Three Queens. For example, if you hold a Queen of Hearts and a Queen of Diamonds, and the board is showing Queen of Diamonds, Jack of Diamonds, seven of Clubs, four of Clubs, and two of Hearts, you can’t be beat. A straight or flush isn’t possible and no rank is higher than your Queens to allow someone to hold a better three of a kind.

The identical pokies

Riddle: A man owns a small casino with 50 pokies, each identical in appearance and the way they function. They all have the same return to player percentage. However, when the man goes to check the pokies at the end of the day there’s one machine which has 25% more in winnings than the others. What is different about this pokie compared to the others?

Answer: Nothing – it ultimately comes down to the human factor and that more people must be playing it and losing.

My girlfriend left me because of my gambling addiction. She claimed I was an idiot.
Casino
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📅︎ Jul 18
What do you call a herd of cows gambling at a marijuana dispensary?
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📅︎ Jun 21
I sold all my body parts to feed my gambling addiction.
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📅︎ Jun 07
What do you call the toilet of a king with a gambling addiction?
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📅︎ Mar 17

They told me “you gotta know how to hold em, and how to fold em.”

🤦🏻‍♂️🤦🏻‍♂️🤦🏻‍♂️Dad out.

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📅︎ Jan 04
I'm heartbroken. The Wife broke up with me because of my chronic gambling issues.
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Gambling Pins

📅︎ Feb 25

.. why do they call it para-dice?

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📅︎ Feb 20
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Sports Betting Puns

📅︎ Oct 02 2019
I'm gonna bet you 50 bucks that I am no longer addicted to gambling
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📅︎ Dec 01 2019
Where can you look up the definitions of drug abuse, alcoholism, and problem gambling?
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📅︎ Nov 08 2019

I bet them I could go longer than them without gambling.

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📅︎ Jul 10 2019
I was talking to my gambling friend. I told him that I went to the races with my wife.

'Did you win?' he asked.

'Of course not,' I replied. 'We didn't even run.'

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📅︎ May 09 2019
Gambling addiction hotlines would do so much better
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📅︎ Feb 13 2019
I tried opening a casino even though gambling was outlawed
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📅︎ Apr 06 2019
My gambling addicted brother has been missing for a while. Last we saw him he lost his life savings in a game of poker.
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📅︎ Jan 20 2019

you poker

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📅︎ Dec 29 2018
a casino was offering free mexican food for all who lost more than $50 in gambling

this is because its clearly nacho lucky day if you lost that much

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Gambling Lapel Pins

📅︎ Nov 12 2018
'I wish you would stop gambling!' I shouted at my son.

'You're no better yourself!' he snapped.

I said, 'Exactly. That's why I don't encourage it.'

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📅︎ Jan 12 2019
When did Adam & Eve discover God didn't like gambling?
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📅︎ Jun 06 2018
Did you hear about the buddhist monk with a huge gambling problem?
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📅︎ Sep 24 2017

High steaks

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📅︎ Sep 02 2017

Too many damn cheetahs.

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📅︎ Jun 25 2013
That Coldplay song must be about a girl with a serious craps/gambling addiction.
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📅︎ Feb 09 2016
My dad occasionally likes to go gambling in Atlantic City..

Me: How did you like Atlantic City?

Dad: It was great! I came home with a small fortune!

Me: Wow! How did you manage that?

Dad: Well, I left home with a large fortune.

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📅︎ Aug 01 2015

My friend was just about done gambling and he said this.

Friend: well I guess I'm done.Dealer: alright I can color you up if you want.friend gives the dealer his chipsFriend: I'm going to need what Obama promised us Americans?Dealer: what?Friend:'change'Dealer:..

Our other friend started laughing too hard and had to leave the area.

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Casino Gambling Puns

📅︎ Aug 26 2014

Because there are too many cheetahs.

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📅︎ Jul 16 2013

(got this from my dad, in a chain email no less.)

Do Las Vegas churches accept gambling chips?

This may come as a surprise to those of you not living in Las Vegas , but there are more Catholic churches than casinos.

Not surprisingly, some worshipers at Sunday services will give casino chips rather than cash when the basket is passed.

Since they get chips from many different casinos, the churches have devised a method to collect the offerings.

The churches send all their collected chips to a nearby Franciscan monastery for sorting and then the chips are taken to the casinos of origin and cashed in.

This is done by the chip monks!

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📅︎ Aug 14 2014
Gambling
'What's the one answer to the question 'Gambling Problem?' you don't want to hear?
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📅︎ Dec 31 2013

Too many Cheetahs!

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📅︎ Dec 17 2013

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